My Mad Family by Abs Five

1. "When I was 13 my mum pulled my trousers down and slapped my bum in front of my friends. I had sworn at her but it was a pretty harsh punishment."

2. "When I was really young my mum sent me to a party dressed as Superman. I was wearing a pair of blue tights, red wellington boots and I had this stupid teacloth tied around my neck! I looked so silly."

3. "My mum once started rapping in front of the band and all our management people. Totally off the top of her head, freestyle man! What did she rap about? Oh it was something along the lines of, 'You are the best, something, something, something.' We had a long discussion on the way home about that one!"